1:17 am as I’m writing this while sitting at the balcony at my dorm. It’s my day off today so I’m staying up just to reflect, or as usual surf the internet. I have a big load of laundry to wash but my sensitive hands won’t allow me to so I’m excusing myself and delaying until I guess later today cause I don’t have a choice anyway but to handwash them. Anyway, I’m writing this just to share some realizations I’ve had in the last year in regards to life, adulting, career and happiness.
With all that I’ve been through, which only I and God know the most about, I’ve come up with realizations I wish someone had told me about before. And here I elaborate.
You won’t always figure out what you want. You won’t because sometimes you really just don’t have an idea of what it could be, probably for the kind of environment that you find yourself in, an environment that doesn’t have the right influence, it doesn’t make you aspire to be anything, everyone is fine with what they have so there’s no more aspirations. Or simply because you don’t dream enough, you are afraid of taking risks, rejections, and not motivated enough, you only wanna stay in your comfort zone.
You won’t always figure out what suits you until you try. Until you actually get out there and show up, you won’t know what you’re capable of doing, you won’t know what kind of job you’ll enjoy doing, you won’t know where you’ll do best. So whenever given an opportunity, give it your best shot as there may not always be another chance. With the number of graduates each year, the competition gets tighter each time.
Some things are just not for you so if you’ve repeatedly done all your best, and keep failing, quit. The world is too big to only stay in one place, to know only one thing. You need not to do what everyone does, nor need to be in the same path. You need not to give in to pressure. It’s okay to find something else and to start again, rather than stay and kill yourself trying to prove you can succeed, you’re meant there while your whole being says otherwise. It really doesn’t matter at all what you choose to be as long as it gives you a sense of fulfillment and you take pride in what you do.
Turn your back around people who gives you negative energy. The kind of people who always have a say to every thing you do. Those who seem to be insecure of themselves and don’t seem like they’ll be happy to see you being successful. You wouldn’t wanna think about them while you already have so much to think about.
Breaks are important. Your mental health matters as much as your physical health. Rest if you may. Be on hiatus. You deserve it. If stresses you more than it makes you happy, it keeps you from sleeping and constantly makes you self-doubt and question your capability, then you probably have to submit a resignation letter.
There will always be that one thing that can change your life forever if you keep trying. When you’ve tried a couple of things but none of them worked out, never get discouraged to try again. You may never know the next one could be the one. Every company is different. Maybe you’ll end up in one next time that gives more time for improvement, or more incentives, has better management that understands employees’ needs, or simply has the kind of job you will enjoy doing.
9:34 pm. I was falling asleep last night as my body clock for this month doesn’t allow me to be much of a night owl. I work from 6 am to 2 pm and tomorrow I work again. So I wasn’t able to post it till now. This would be all for now but I’m going to add more later once I’ve gathered my thoughts again and have the time to write. Well I actually have so much time. Just this social media always keeps me occupied and I just feel sad sometimes for myself. Hopefully soon I can stick to a number of hours I can only use social media cause I feel like it is not good for my brain literally, like it gives me headache, perhaps due to radiation esp. that I’ve so much of it at work already. Anyway, wish me luck with it. For now I’m gonna get some sleep for my early shift tomorrow.